So I’m new to the world of maternity jeans. I”ve been wearing them for about two weeks now. They’re comfortable. As Leslie has written about, it totally validates that you do not really need buttons in pants ever. However, let me tell you a cautionary tale of horror and dread and utter mortification…it happened one hour ago as I type….
I was sitting at a restaurant with some colleagues (including my boss!) from work. We were eating dinner. It was so nice and we were laughing and joking, etc. Then the waiter comes up to me and he leans down and he says in my ear (rather loudly) “you need to pull up your pants”. I hear him loud and clear but the look of utter befuddlement on my face and shere terror/mortification allows me more than a few seconds to process this and I start feeling towards my bottom (which to me, felt totaly covered but maybe my ass has grown a third cheek). The waiter takes this pause in mortification as me not being able to hear him correctly…my face getting redder and redder…and says a little more loudly “you need to pull up your pants, miss!”. I do but I am still so confused because I still feel totally covered. Then everyone at the table is looking at me and is like “what is going on , Megan”…and I just say, with as much dignity as a girl who’s pants are falling down in public unwittingly can “I guess my pants are falling down”. They just started laughing, which is probably the best reaction I could ask for and someone says “oh that is just very funny”. Someone else says “doesn’t he know you’re pregnant!” (how would he?).
Since I apparently feel like I”m totally covered all the time, I am going to apologize in advance if I ever inadvertantly moon any of you. I must have very insulated butt cheeks that keep me nice and toasty. Dangerously low maternity jeans and junk in the trunk do not mix well. Oil and water and social disaster…
Hrmmm…I wonder if I’ll regret posting this.